Feeling invalidated again? This moment may be the springboard to propel you forward.

 Passed over for a promotion yet again? You put in the time and effort to grow your self-awareness after the last couple of performance cycles. You worked on sharpening your communication skills, stepped outside your comfort zone, and showed up every day with an attitude of service, and yet, here you are being tested again. This time around, the invalidation hurts.

 
First, take the time to grieve. Acknowledge that you are feeling lost and unsure of the path ahead.  If your frustration leads to crying into your pillow at night or in the shower in the morning, let the emotions flow.  

Remember, “What doesn't kill us makes us stronger”- Friedrich Nietzsche.

When you are feeling centered again, reflect on the situation and take the time to recall a time when you navigated a storm well.

That experience made you stronger and built up your resourcefulness. We all have valor within us, and this reflection on a prior trial will give you the confidence that you will find a way forward. It's only when we look back on our lives that we can connect the dots and appreciate how that original burden may have been a blessing. The troubles of the past have introduced you to your strengths and virtues.

Adversity shows up to test our mettle. Every failure has a buried message- can you see it, hear it, and feel it? This exploration will take time. It may reveal a skill you need to develop. During this exercise, ensure that your self-serving narratives are not blurring the message. Be as open as you can and above all, be honest with yourself. You will find a way.

What tries to break you often offers you a chance to build new skills that will serve you for the rest of your life.

We all know that heroes are not made during periods of calm but during days of trials and anguish. Nelson Mandela became an extraordinary leader, visionary, and legend during his long and challenging days in the prison on Robben Island. Sharing a picture of his prison cell from my recent trip. 



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